Its been a while since I’ve added a blog post. Partly because life happened and partly because I have been questioning why I’m doing this and whether I’m actually capable?
As I sit here crying and hiding in my bedroom because I’m surrounded by builders, tradesman, family, kids and mess I remembered that writing my blog was actually really therapeutic. So here I am, bashing the keys on my laptop!
Why am I crying you may ask? Because sometimes when you are renovating a house it all just gets too much. Plus I’m frustrated with myself. I’m frustrated because I don’t understand the technical terms companies use. They forget that I’m just a normal person who has no formal training whatsoever in renovations. After 6 years you’d think I’d have picked up a thing or two?
Now don’t get me wrong, our builder and foreman have been absolutely amazing and they have held my hand every single step of the way with the orangery build. I couldn’t have got through it without him.
We are now onto the last stages of the whole house renovating process which involves building the garage and getting the garden designed and finished. If we wanted to spend a huge amount of money I would have passed it into a company to deal with everything themselves, project manage it and save myself the stress. But…. we had a quote for the double garage for £47k excluding the ground works and driveway and we were convinced that this was excessive and could save ourselves some money. Upon making that decision it also meant that you take on some of the stress yourselves. Queue the crying!
I’ve sent millions of emails to the architect, planners, builders, garage build company and its getting so confusing with where each job responsibility starts and finishes. And I’m scared. Scared that in attempting to save us some money but I’m going to mess it up and its going to cost us more in the long run.
I’m tired and I’m questioning everything and my capability of doing this and actually pulling it off. To put it bluntly, its draining.
I’m not really sure where I’m going with this post but here I am regardless. I’ve sent the emails I need to send for today and perhaps with a fresh head tomorrow it will make so much more sense. Here’s hoping hey?!
Moral of the story? Breath….. Take time out…. Give it a go…. Admit when you do’t understand and its all getting to much…. And for me crying and hiding in your bedroom for an hour maybe, just maybe is what you need. Just one last push to get this renovation project finally finished off.
Signing off now and will be taking the kids out and treating them to a ice cream!